Funeral Arrangements

The Christian view of death

A funeral service will reflect the personality of the one who has died and the circumstances of their death. Feelings of grief, gratitude, joy and sadness often intermingle. Sometimes, a sense of tragedy is uppermost, especially when it is a young person who has died. When it is the end of a long and fruitful life, the feelings of thanksgiving can be strongest.

Funeral services always raise profound questions about the meaning of life and death. Jesus himself believed in a life-giving God: 'the God of the living, not of the dead.' Christians believe that Christ's resurrection at Easter is the triumph of good over evil and of life over death and has made eternal life available to us.

What happens after we die remains a mystery. Some Anglicans believe in Christ's continuing power beyond death to cleanse us of our sins and bring us into the closer presence of God. That is why those of the more Catholic tradition pray for those who are dead. What Heaven is like, no one can exactly say, but the Bible affirms that in God's kingdom we shall delight in the presence and love of God and of the whole company of heaven.

Whatever is wonderful about life here on earth is only a glimpse of the glory of the life that is to come. The comfort we need in order to find the strength to come to terms with death and bereavement can be found in the promises of Jesus Christ, in the hope of the Resurrection and in the belief that our departed loved ones are safe in the hands of God.

In the days before and after the funeral there may not be much of an opportunity to reflect on these things, but the parish clergy will be glad to offer help in thinking through how you have been affected personally by the death of your loved one. Melbourne Parish Church is open during daylight hours (from 9.00am until 5.00pm) and you are welcome to visit and find in the oasis of quiet and reflection, the presence of God. The name of your loved one will be remembered during the parish services before and after the funeral service. You are very welcome to join in the parish services.

On the Sunday nearest to All Souls' Day (2 November) a service of Thanksgiving and Commemoration for the Departed is held in church and this can be an opportunity for you to attend, and to light a candle during the service to remember your loved ones. You, and your family, will receive a personal invitation to attend the first service after the funeral.

 Things to consider when arranging a funeral

  • The person who has died may have left a paragraph in their will describing the sort of funeral arrangements they hoped for. Naturally, the family will want to keep to such arrangements as far as possible.

  • Everyone has the right to a funeral in their parish church, even if the family and the deceased have not been church-goers. The parish church is the spiritual 'home' of everyone who lives within the parish of Melbourne and we are here to help you arrange the funeral service for your loved one.

  • Parish clergy regard the taking of funerals as an important part of their work. Before a funeral the family will be visited by a minister, to offer comfort to those who are facing loss, to find out what service they want to use and to help them to arrange it. If the priest did not know the deceased person, then it would help to provide some details, especially if there is to be an address within the service.

  • The funeral director plays a very important part in the co-ordinating of the funeral arrangements and will want to know if the funeral is to be in the parish church or if the parish clergy are to take the service in the crematorium. They will advise you of the fees for a funeral service in church, at a cemetery, or crematorium.

  • Whatever type of service you choose, you can discuss the order of service with the parish clergy and also the funeral director, as both will be familiar with how to plan the service and arrange for the printing of the service sheet.

  • You can have an organist with music and hymns of your choice, or an organist with music and no hymns. You may wish to have no music – that is fine.

  • The family may request for the bells to be rung before the funeral service. As funerals are normally on a week day, please discuss with the Rector as he will need to check that bell ringers are available, as many are at work during the week. The cost is the same as weddings, and the Rector will explain these to you.

  • The committal is a particularly solemn moment of the funeral service. It takes place in church before the hearse leaves for the crematorium, or at the graveside, in the crematorium chapel.

    The committal can be a very emotional moment. Many who are suffering grief find that, even in their sadness, the words of prayer can lift them towards the experience of Christian rejoicing in the knowledge of life beyond death. It is sometimes a private occasion when the family wish to have the opportunity of saying their own personal goodbye to their loved one.

    The offering of prayer and the trust that the person is in God's safe hands can begin the process of healing the grief of loss.

  • It is becoming more common for the whole service to take part in the church, but it is possible for the main part of the service to take place in the church (i.e. the readings, address, prayers and commendation), and then to either go to the cemetery or crematorium for the short service of committal.

    The Parish Churchyard was closed for burials many years ago but there is a public cemetery in Melbourne.

    Although rare nowadays, a funeral service can be conducted entirely at the graveside in the cemetery. In this case, the family gather round the open grave into which the coffin is lowered and hear the words: 'We now commit his/her body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in the sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ.' Handfuls of earth are then scattered on the coffin by the funeral director.

    If you wish, it is possible to have the funeral service at the crematorium only, conducted by one of the parish clergy. Here, the words of committal may be accompanied by the closing of a curtain to hide the coffin from view, or in some crematoria the coffin is moved slowly out of sight.

  • The service begins with the priest or other minister reading aloud such reassuring sentences from the scriptures as: 'I am the resurrection and the life,' says the Lord; Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.’

    Early in the service there may be a eulogy or appreciation remembering the life and work of the deceased. This may be given by a family member or somebody who knew the deceased well, but as funerals are emotional services, it is recommended that this is left to the minister. Please discuss this with the minister officiating.

    The address following the Bible reading and the subsequent prayers affirm the great Christian beliefs about life beyond death, which hopefully will be a comfort and strength to those gathered. It is possible to include within the service other nonbiblical readings or poems.

    The prayer of commendation recalls the promise of the resurrection and entrusts the deceased person to the love and mercy of God, asking for comfort and strength for those who mourn.

  • It is possible for you to have a private funeral service with committal before gathering for a thanksgiving or memorial service after this at the parish church, on the same day or at another time.

 

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